Today, Tak and I began our plan to conquer Serpentia. It was a simple plan: manipulate their minds, then access their strengths to play for our own good.
We started at SAYWAG. First, we went over to a Serpentian child, one we knew was very skilled.
"Orok," began Tak, "Pon said your wings are small."
"What? Pon!" Orok screamed. "Pon, you said we were besssstiess!"
"Huh? You're getting mad over nothing, Orok."
"They said! And the generic girl is hot, and Myu has big, magically changing wings! They won't lie!"
"Orok. You're insssane."
Sure enough, Orok attacked Pon with his snakey fangs! Tak knew that since Serpentian children are trained for war so early in their lives, and they are so ruthless and dim-witted, tturning them against each other was the best solution to weaken them. The teacher wouldn't stop the fighting. He was a cowardly FOOL! Or a...FOOLISH COWARD! When two Serpentians fight over their wings, things become brutal. Other babies tried to cease it, but it was futile. Everything was in shambles by the time the principal got out here.
The principal tried to sort things out, but the raging Orok tried attacking him. He called the police, but by the time they got there, he was under the impression the police thought his wings were too light colored. Wonder why??? Chaos ensued. Finally, the Serpent Force and Winged Saviors got there. Every official in the planet was in the same location, wasting time dealing with the baby. I got in my voot and Tak got in her ship. We headed down to the Serpent Force HQ and raided the joint for anything of use. We found ray guns, communicators- everything. Then...Nio showed up. Poop.
"I sssensssed you had sssomething to do with this, Myu...and...generic...Irken." When I told him who Tak was, you should have seen his face. He had loved this "Lizdrette"!
"I'm ssstill going to defeat you and sssave our planet for good. Only a Ssserpentian can ussse thisss technology. You need wing ssscans, tail-printssss...thingsss you can't provide that I can! You are dead, Invader Myu."
"Not. Sso. Fasst."
Mika, the rebellious Serpentian boy, was standing there.
"I've been sstudying up on glitchess in ssome tachnology, and I found one way to acc-ssessss the main military computer that doessn't need Sserpentian assssisstanc-ssance. Yeesh, I can't ssay anything in Sserpentian dialect without making a fool of mysself!"
Nio was dead serious. "Mika....you're jeopardizing our entire home."
"I don't care! I hate thiss planet! Pleasse let it die sso I can move to somewhere nic-sser!"
Nio started tackling Mika. I knew he was strong in muscle, so I said, "BUNS! Attack mode!"
"Whatever!" She sprung into action.
"MiMi! Follow!" Tak commanded her SIR to attack. The two powers combined to lock Nio up in the little cell nearby, where all he could do was watch. He wailed as we hacked the mainframe for the final attack.
I called the Tallest first. "Check it, Almighty Tallest! I've infiltrated the main Serpentian military base!"
"Impressive, Invader Myu. And you've got...Tak with you?" "Tak, you're not an Invader."
"True, my Tallest, but I will say I have contributed a lot to the invasion since I snuck here. I feel that's worthy of Invader status." I nodded to show this was true.
"Sorry. You need to retest in 70 years."
"What?!" Tak was raging. I calmed her down more or less by reminding her she had a lot of time to train. We told the Tallest to report ASAP with the Armada to weaken the planet.
"People of Serpentia! You are fools! Prepare to be conquered! Oh wait, you can't...because I locked every piece of military technology! HAHAHA!!!"
The Armada arrived. Victory was easy against the defenseless Serpentians, making me the second Invader in I.D. II to conquer a planet. Tak was left behind not by me, but by the Tallest, as I was a real Invader.
The fate of Serpentia is undefined. I suggested we turn the people of Serpentia into military allies and teachers. It is likely to become a military planet, or maybe an entertainment planet. All I know is, I am done with Serpentia.
There is one thing, though: Mika. The boy may have become Serpentian, but he did pretty much give me all the info needed to conquer my first planet. Maybe we'll meet again someday.
But for now, I'm not going to rest. I will discover another planet to add to the Empire! Planets no one has even seen before! Species dumber than the dumbest dumbies! The possibilities are endless! Yay, Myu!